HISTORIES
Memory, Emotion, and the Echoes That Shape Us
Our histories don’t just live in the past—they leap, whisper, and sing into the present. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how memory surprises us, repeats itself, and deepens our emotional understanding of self.
Each of us has a personal history. We all know this. Some pay attention to the details, some do not. No matter which camp you fall in, your history pays attention to you and can leap into the present. You don’t have to summon it; your history has a mind of its own and jumps into the present, often when you least expect it. Histories make surprise attacks, and they also make repeat performances.
THE SURPRISE ATTACK
This form of “history jumping” is unexpected. You may think or say, “Where did that come from?” Driving down the road, suddenly, an old rock ‘n roll song pops into your head, and you wonder where that came from. Standing in the shower and practicing your toast for the upcoming wedding, an image of your first dog pops into your head, and you wonder what that is about. Following the thread to find the connection can be interesting. Our brain has just pulled two pieces of history together, and our brain always has a good reason. Trust me. Your brain always has a good reason. Often, we dismiss these as flukes and miss the fun of discovery. When we take time to follow the thread of connection, the insight is always satisfying.
Take a quick look at the rock ‘n roll song as an example. You are barreling down the interstate and listening to some classical music. Out of the corner of your eye, you spot an old barn in a field. On the side of the barn, you glimpse the old advertising sign: “Chew Mail Pouch Tobacco.” The song, of course, was playing on the radio when you took your first date on a country ride. See. Your brain does remember everything.
THE REPEAT PERFORMANCES
Okay. Now that we understand the surprise attack, what is the repeat performance? The most straightforward example is the song you cannot get out of your mind. That one is a real stinker. No matter how hard you wish it to disappear, it keeps jumping back into the present. Whatever the song is, it shows up for a reason. The key is to find the reason. Many people will dismiss this experience as an irritation and will go away or wait for it to exhaust itself. I prefer to be curious and dig into the memory bank for more clues.
Remember “Sherry, Sherry Baby”? The repetition is a killer. And Frankie Valli is an absolute screamer. Yet, there it is, pounding in your head and screaming to get out. Now, just what has triggered this one? I don’t know about you, but I tend to keep things and rarely clean out drawers and closets. So, over the holiday, I did a purge. And at the same time, my sister sent me some old photographs that some distant relative had sent her. In part, the relative was hoping to have some people identified, but my junior high school picture is in the collection. Yep. Sock hops with the white rolled-down socks and “Sherry, Sherry Baby” blasting on the loudspeakers.
As I said, your brain holds onto everything.
Want to explore how memory and emotion shape personal and collective histories? Visit Psychology in Action’s guide to flashbulb memory and historical connection, PSYFORU’s breakdown of episodic memory and emotional recall, and Psychology Today’s reflections on emotional memory and identity.
If you’re reflecting on memory, emotional connection, or personal history, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support insight, healing, and emotional clarity.
By Dr. Gloria K Vanderhorst
