Category: Blog Posts

Why Early Education Needs Movement, Challenge, and Male Role Models and Boys’ Natural Development

I want to put a tree in every preschool classroom, so that every child, especially energetic boys, can experience learning through active play and physical challenge.

Do you remember being really young and finding adventure in the backyard, or in the woods down the street, or at the park at the end of the block? The center of attraction was often a tree that presented the ultimate challenge: climb me.

When I was growing up, our neighborhood had the perfect challenge tree. We called it the “wiggly tree.” Its shape was bizarre—rising out of the ground about four feet, then taking a sharp turn to run parallel to the ground for another four feet, and then shooting up toward the sky. What caused this tree to grow that way will forever remain a mystery. But the challenge was obvious.

When you were very young, getting up those first four feet was nearly impossible. Once you gained the height that allowed that climb, you were golden. You could scoot along the trunk to the next challenge, keeping your balance so you wouldn’t fall off and have to start over. Of course, we’re not counting how many times your brother pushed you off while laughing.

Once you conquered the section parallel to the ground, you were ready to climb. The branches seemed arranged to invite you upward. Right foot, left foot, repeat. The challenge was to see how high you could go. Fortunately, no one ever fell out. That feels like a miracle, because broken bones, or worse, could easily have happened.

Let me explain why I believe every preschool should have a tree.

A tree offers children—especially boys who often struggle to sit still during story time—an engaging way to focus and learn. By letting them balance and move in a tree, we can channel their energy into attentive learning without forcing them to remain seated.

The educational system often favors learning styles more common among girls: sitting quietly, listening, staying still. Boys frequently need movement, challenge, and physical engagement to learn effectively. This difference is rarely reflected in how classrooms are structured.

I also want to put a male teacher in every preschool classroom.

The early stages of school are critical. They set the stage for a child’s future in education. An investment here pays off for years to come. Every classroom should be staffed by both a male and a female teacher. Young boys especially benefit from seeing and learning from male role models in their earliest educational experiences.

Helping children climb trees at a young age builds their confidence and physical skills, making other challenges—like climbing ladders—easier to handle later in life.

For more reflections on boys’ development, movement‑based learning, and early childhood education, explore articles on Psychology Today and research from Greater Good Science Center.

If you want support advocating for boys’ emotional and developmental needs, or navigating early childhood challenges, learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that help families and educators support boys’ natural strengths.

I STORE PLATES IN MY MICROWAVE

Technology, Tradition, and the Humor of Household Habits

Microwaves may be designed for cooking, but they’ve also become symbols of skepticism, adaptation, and the occasional storage hack. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how kitchen appliances carry stories—of resistance, reinvention, and the laughter that binds us.

My favorite restaurant had a problem in the kitchen, so going there for lunch was out. The group planning to meet, chat, and be well served had to regroup. We decided to join each other over Zoom to avoid missing everything completely. As the conversation focused on kitchens—since a problem in the kitchen now shut down our favorite place—one of our number announced that she had never used her microwave. The device serves as a storage cabinet.

You laugh! We all laughed. Then I recalled my introduction to the microwave. The school lunchroom where our daughter went to school had installed a bank of microwaves. This was at the very beginning of the microwave craze. In the 1970s and early ’80s, the microwave was a must-have for the modern kitchen.

I was skeptical. I wondered if this thing could cook more than what was inside. Now, I could have researched the safety of microwaves, but instead, I leaned into my Midwestern roots and insisted that even if I could accept it, I did not want to use it. Therefore, there was no reason to purchase one simply as a decoration for the counter. This is likely a distortion of something my Uncle Johnnie claimed at some point when I was a child and wanted him to install indoor plumbing. That is a story for another day.

The microwave debate in our house continued for over a year before I relented. We have had a microwave ever since, which now gets daily use. I am happy to report that my hair has not fallen out, and as far as I know, none of my organs have been sautéed.

However, my vulnerability was publicly exposed during my daughter’s high school senior speech. The senior speech is required for graduation and is a big deal. Each senior must give a speech in the large auditorium. The public is invited, and of course, all of the proud parents show up, bringing along grandma and grandpa. I had no preview of this speech, and that was purposeful. No other speech gained the laughter of my daughter’s speech as she proceeded to recount the microwave debate. The parents sitting close to me asked if she made it up. I had to report that every word was true.

So, I greatly sympathize with my friend who stores dishes in her microwave. She had no choice; the place came furnished with a microwave. Now, it does not store many dishes, just enough to keep the counter space tidy.

Want to explore how microwaves have shaped cooking habits and cultural quirks? Visit Common Good Ventures’ guide to microwave impact across cultures, Hot Food Oven’s breakdown of microwave influence on daily life, and MicrowavesHub’s reflections on microwave history and habits.

If you’re reflecting on household habits, generational humor, or emotional connection, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support insight, healing, and everyday resilience.

Connection, Memory, and the Architecture of the Mind

We were born connected, and living in your heads too long can leave us isolated. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how early experiences shape emotional storage, and why reaching beyond our internal world is essential for healing and growth.

I heard someone say this and thought, so true.

If I stay in my head and I am my preferred, best, or only neighbor, then I am in trouble.

You know that we were born connected to another person. How many times have I said this? We then spend the rest of our lives plugging into others and seeking connection. If we are lucky or wise, our choices can be pretty productive. However, we are all born into families. In that circumstance, we have no control over whether we are wise or lucky.

We are stuck with the family we were born into or placed into in the case of those adopted. We had no choice. It would be wonderful if the wisdom of an infant could be used to choose a family. I say that because infants are brilliant at reading emotions. That brilliance would allow them to choose emotionally mature and caring parents every time. However, infants do not get a choice. Sorry, baby. You are stuck.

Then, your head records everything that happens to you. With that database, you face the world. Think of this as a data program. The programmer is your parents. You are the computer or data hub. You are not like one of those data centers out in the suburbs where people protest because your energy consumption and external vibes are ruining the neighborhood. You are a stand-alone entity that absorbs and collects everything that happens around you.

You might think of yourself as one of those robotic vacuum cleaners. You pick up everything you encounter and hold it. Sorry, you do not get to dump the contents at the end of the day. You store it. And it affects how you function the next day. Sorry, but true.

Storage is complicated. Some things are in easily accessible cardboard boxes waiting for you at the front door. Some things are in closets and drawers, where you can see them, but only if you go hunting. Some things are sitting out where you can see them. This is an interesting category because a few are visible but locked behind glass doors, and others are on high shelves where you rarely go, but they still have an influence. Some are easily accessible right there on the coffee table or lamp stand. Here, we see how important access is.

Your head stores everything. Sorry to inform you, but it does. Some things are easily accessible because they make you smile and laugh. Some things are completely inaccessible because their influence is hidden and heavy. Thank you, brain, for that protection. However, I may not need or benefit from that protection, and giving me access may lead to a much better adjustment in the long run.

Want to explore how emotional memory and relational connection shape mental health? Visit Psychology Today’s article on why we get stuck in our heads and Greater Good’s guide to getting out of your own head.

If you’re navigating emotional isolation, memory overload, or relational disconnection, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional clarity, connection, and healing.

The Small, Everyday Wonders We Notice When We Slow Down

Windows are more than architectural features. They are frames, of seasons, of neighbors, of movement, of stories unfolding whether or not we step outside.

Do you ever stop to think about the things you see from the window?

I recently watched a television show about a couple who built a home completely underground. The importance of windows then struck me. They had some skylights, but a skylight is very different from a window. First, to really look out of a skylight, you have to lie on the floor, the couch, or the table, depending on where the skylight is. Next, the skylight panorama is really quite limited. You are looking up rather than looking around.

Attending to the view from the window suddenly became quite important. Some of you may be reminded of Rear Window, which is quite dramatic. Others may think that the bird feeders outside your kitchen window make washing the dishes more pleasant as you observe different species fighting for a perch and admire the occasional downy woodpecker sending all of the others screeching.

So many delightful things happen outside the window. The snow saw the side street turn into a slalom run, which was both great fun and sometimes terrifying. When the trees begin to leaf out, there is an explosion of green hues and shadows that dance along the ground.

Then there are the people. I am particularly fascinated by the young woman who has mastered the unicycle. I like the three‑wheeled, low‑to‑the‑ground tricycle. She is a marvel and must be very strong with exceptional balance. Remember that hill I just described? She pedals up that thing with ease and floats down it at a terrifying speed, all with grace.

A trail of pedestrians walks by on their way to the bus stop, just like clockwork, morning and evening. Then the school bus stops at the corner, and the variety of teens climbing off is truly interesting. What is it about being a teenager that leads to such experimentation? Hairstyles. Clothing. Backpack arrangements. Footwear. You name it, and they are experimenting with it. An artist would have a great time capturing the adventure that unfolds as the school bus lets out.

Then there are the trees that tap on the second‑story windows as though they want to come inside. Skinny branches brush the mullions, making a sound quite different from those tapping the glass. The second‑story windows provide a very different perspective on the world. Why have the neighbors decided to keep this four‑story fir tree that is completely bare except for a top knot of branches? What is the point? Give the fir a decent burial and be done with it.

Windows invite us to notice what we might otherwise miss—movement, change, humor, mystery, and the quiet rhythms of daily life. They remind us that the world is always unfolding, even when we are still.

For more reflections on observation, presence, and the psychology of everyday life, visit Psychology Today’s essays on mindfulness and perception and Greater Good’s research on attention and well‑being.

If noticing the world from your window stirs thoughts about your own inner landscape, therapy can help you explore those reflections with clarity and grounding. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support insight and emotional growth.

BLOG OR ESSAY?

Structure, Freedom, and the Joy of Going Nuts

Blogs wander. Essays march. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how blogs and essays differ in purpose, structure, and emotional tone—and why both have a place in the writer’s toolkit.

Are these two things the same?

A blog is short for “weblog,” which sounds unique to the computer and the World Wide Web. A blog is a written piece intended for distribution through the computer onto the Web. An essay is also a written piece intended to communicate something of substance. Essays are often a part of early writing education, helping the student understand logical structure and use structure to communicate a serious purpose.

Now let me ask this again: Are these two things the same?

The blog has no particular purpose or structure. It could be a written item or a string of pictures, as long as some words accompany it. Its unique characteristic is its intent to distribute. Now that sounds dangerous, but I mean that the blog is designed to be posted on the Web. The essay appears to have a clear intent to communicate in writing. The essay must have a topic sentence, a supporting narrative, and a conclusion. Essays also come in particular structures or intents. They can be narrative, descriptive, expository, argumentative, persuasive, or informational. Wow! Lots of choices!

Essays also have a process of development that is specifically taught. The essay requires five steps: planning, drafting, revising, editing, and proofreading. Essay writing sounds quite purposeful.

As you will recognize from my past and this blog, blogging has no specific structure. I can roam anywhere, take any time I want, and land somewhere without connection to my beginning. In other words, bloggers can go nuts! Furthermore, the blog does not have to have any intent other than smashing a bunch of words together. A blog can be a real mash-up as the blogger goes nuts.

Speaking of nuts, do you have a favorite nut? If I had to choose just one, I actually prefer the mixed nut can, but if I had to choose just one, it would be the cashew. My husband, on the other hand, goes nuts for pistachios. Now, I don’t like my nuts to be green, as that makes me think they are tainted or infected with something. And those shells are sharp. He once thought of collecting a bunch of them to throw into the garden, so that the sharp edges on the shells would cut the bunnies’ feet and send them racing from the garden. You guessed it. It did not work, and that saved me from ordering a container full of cashew shells. You can do that! Who knew?

See. A blog can go anywhere.

Want to explore how blogs and essays differ in structure and creative freedom? Visit Influno’s guide to blog vs essay writing, AskAnyDifference’s comparison of blog and essay, and EssayJob’s breakdown of essays vs creative writing.

If you’re reflecting on writing style, creative expression, or communication skills, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support insight, creativity, and voice.

Choosing the Right School, What Maryland and DC Students Should Consider

Did you have the college experience, or are you having it now as an adult?

Spring is when many students begin searching for the right college. It’s a season of campus visits, exploring new places, and finding a school that truly fits, much like choosing clothes that match your personal style.

This is an important decision for both students and parents.

Cost matters. Try to stay within your family’s budget and look for scholarships. Many scholarships go unused simply because students don’t apply. Taking the lead on this can help with costs and open more options.

Climate is another factor. Some students head north for cold and snow, others go south for warmth, and some don’t care either way. If you have a favorite kind of weather or enjoy certain sports, keep that in mind. You may need different clothing, so include that in your budget.

Once you’ve considered cost and climate, it’s time to look at academics. Academics matter, but they may not be your only priority. Your college counselor will suggest schools based on your grades, but you can explore other options too. Just know this may involve some risk or require personal connections.

Choosing a college is a lot like choosing a suit. You may not use it forever, but it needs to fit well. You’ll likely be there for four years—unless you finish early, as I did.

What you study in college helps shape your future and prepares you for work and new experiences. Many graduates stay in touch with professors and use them as references for jobs or graduate school. College is a key time to figure out who you are and choose a path that may last for years. Whether you stick with your first choice or change directions and meet new people, your college years will have a lasting impact on your life.

Take your time choosing a college. The school you pick can shape your future for many years.

For more reflections on growth, decision‑making, and emotional development, explore articles on Psychology Today and research from Greater Good Science Center.

If you or your family are navigating major life transitions—like preparing for college—therapy can help clarify values, reduce stress, and support healthy decision‑making. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support young adults and families during times of change.

Capacity, Culture, and the Metaphor of a Meal

What Is on Your Plate? Isn’t this the question? Do you ever wonder how this reference got started? Or consider the recent GEICO commercial, where the little green guy is offered a tiny plate of food. “Who comes up with these things?”

The size of that plate should get all of us thinking. What is our capacity? How much can we really handle?

Some people are definitely in the gecko’s category, where they can only handle a small amount. Life has to be orderly, familiar, and perhaps repetitive for them to feel safe and comfortable. Some are at the other end of the spectrum and can manage a cornucopia of things with seeming ease.

Plates have been used to carry food since prehistoric times. Of course, not the china-type plates. For the caveman, the plate may have been a large leaf, a piece of animal hide, or a slab of bark. As cultures advanced, so did the plate. Egyptians used clay with fancy designs as elegant serving dishes.

The Renaissance saw the emergence of ceramic dinnerware. Colors and decorations were available, allowing the household to create their own unique designs. During the Enlightenment, the art of plate decoration was a refined art form. Today, you can find ceramic classes where plate decorating remains a popular activity.

In the modern era, plates are made of plastic. These were so durable that you could play with them as flying saucers in the backyard or street, then wash them up for dinner. And we should also include the dreaded paper plate!

But how did these practical carriers of food turn into a description of your day? The Oxford English Dictionary attributes the popularization of this phrase to the courtroom in 1928. Apparently, a witness described his plight by saying, “I have a lot on my plate.” The judge, being confused about the meaning of this, asked for clarity, and the witness referred to a life currently full of worry or problems.

So, there you have it. Having a lot on your plate is a metaphor for being burdened, busy, or occupied. What size is your plate?

Want to explore how emotional load and personal boundaries shape well-being? Visit Psychology Today’s guide to managing emotional load and Greater Good’s article on setting boundaries without guilt.

If you’re navigating overwhelm, emotional strain, or life balance, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support clarity, capacity, and emotional resilience.

PLAYING BRIDGE

Strategy, Sociability, and the Drama of the Deal

Bridge isn’t just a game—it’s a microcosm of human interaction. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how bridge blends logic, emotion, and partnership into a rich tapestry of competition and connection.

Do you indulge in this popular game? Is it a game?

Our neighborhood used to have a regular bridge game. We set up two tables in someone’s living room, and members took turns choosing whose house to use. Occasionally, an extra neighbor would show up, but generally, we were a gathering of 8. That makes two bridge tables of 4 each. We tended to rotate around so that you would play with at least two different partners by the end of the evening. The evening was friendly, even though at least two neighbors were cracker-jack bridge players. One had learned the game while flying planes off the early carriers. The other had learned as a toddler at her mother’s knee. She was a real cracker-jack and as gentle and kind as any soul. She knew everything about bridge and would answer any question, but she never complained about losing or revisited any hand or bid. She was a gem.

The game’s descriptions say it can be a casual party game or a serious competition. Our neighborhood game fell somewhere in between. Each person had some skill, and we were each competitive in other aspects of our lives, so this naturally showed up at the table. Compared to others, the interesting thing about this game is that it has techniques and strategies you can learn to improve your game. The more you play, the more serious the game becomes as you learn new conventions and strategies.

Bridge is a partnership game. You and your partner are to develop skills in parallel. There are “secret” codes of communication. Of course, if the other members at the table use the same conventions, they are not secret. Bridge is like a foreign language. Some things that you say have precise meanings. I have often wondered why the language is circumspect. Why not just say, “I have 4 of your best suit, so I think we can beat these other guys!” However, that is not allowed. You must use your card sense to determine what each of you has and land the best contract. Memorizing the conventions is a must!

Then one member of the partnership plays the hand. This can be dangerous. The observer is sometimes judgmental of the player. Now, they are not allowed to say anything, though I must tell you that some partners ignore this convention and blast away. Playing requires concentration, as you must plan ahead and adjust your strategy when the opposition throws curveballs. Concentration goes out the window if your partner is jumping into the fray. Feelings of irritation, fear, embarrassment, and other forms of trepidation jump into the mix, and your concentration is kaputt.

It is a game, but like many other games, it is a serious endeavor and a social treat!

Want to explore how bridge sharpens emotional intelligence and strategic thinking? Visit The Sports Reviewer’s guide to bridge psychology, SAGE’s study on strategy and impression management in bridge, and Bridge MindSport’s breakdown of emotional complexity and partnership dynamics.

If you’re reflecting on social connection, cognitive challenge, or emotional resilience, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support insight, healing, and interpersonal growth.

Remembering Sacrifice, Loss, Cherishing Memory, and Choosing Daily Acts of Respect

As Memorial Day nears, I find myself deeply moved by the experience of loss. The recent passing of a cherished long‑term friend stirs both sadness and gratitude in my heart. He was gentle and compassionate, bringing warmth into the lives he touched. His work stood as a beacon of excellence, his guidance of his daughters was filled with wisdom and tenderness, his unwavering love for his wife inspired admiration, and his service to his country was selfless and brave.

Living near Washington, D.C., I am surrounded by memorials that echo the sacrifices of countless men and women. The city’s monuments are silent witnesses to the hopes, dreams, and heartbreak of those who built this nation with their lives. Every Memorial Day, I am reminded to feel gratitude for the unimaginable loss that allows me to wake each morning in peace.

Visiting the national battlefields near my home is always profoundly moving. The hallowed grounds of Manassas, Monocacy, Antietam, Ox Hill, South Mountain, Fredericksburg, Spotsylvania, and Gettysburg are steeped in the memory of lives freely given for unity. Standing there, I am enveloped by the sense of sacrifice and the unspoken stories of anguish, courage, and hope embedded in the soil.

The memorial at Pearl Harbor brings forth powerful reminders of our vulnerability and the heavy toll paid to defend freedom in World War II. Decades earlier, H.G. Wells’s hope in calling World War I “the war to end all wars” speaks to the longing for a peaceful resolution. Yet sorrow fills me as I see that mankind has not broken free from the cycle of conflict, and wars continue to claim lives around the world.

We struggle to find peace with one another and show true respect. Achieving this requires recognizing the profound value of sacrifice in daily life. On a summer night, turning down the boombox becomes an act of compassion for a weary neighbor. Sharing block‑party plans is not just a courtesy, but a gesture of understanding and care that lets neighbors find moments of quiet or gather joy elsewhere.

As you hang your flag on Monday, May 26, take a moment to express gratitude for the sacrifices made — and commit to practicing respect and understanding in your daily life as a way to honor those who gave everything.

For more reflections on grief, remembrance, and the psychology of honoring loss, explore articles on Psychology Today and research from Greater Good Science Center.

If you are navigating grief or reflecting on the meaning of loss, therapy can offer space for understanding, healing, and remembrance. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional resilience and compassionate processing.

The Fabric We All Know, But Rarely Stop to Understand

You will immediately have associations with that word. Perhaps a ragged, fringed pair of jeans you wore as a teen, or a sleek, tight‑fitting pair you sported at the local bar hoping to catch someone’s eye. Maybe you had a duffel bag made of the stuff, or a sturdy laundry bag that survived years of use.

I remember a pair of overalls that were so adorable on my toddler that they were worn constantly. And who can forget the denim jacket from high school? Denim is sturdy, dependable, and always shows up. But how much do we really know about this fabric?

Surprisingly, denim is French. Truly. I was certain it was an American invention rooted somewhere in the West, tied to cowboys and cattle drives. Apparently not.

Denim dates back to the 17th century — far earlier than Levi’s. French weavers, experimenting with fabric, developed a cotton twill using two different threads: one indigo and one white. The weave was perfect: strong, durable, nearly indestructible. Even more surprising, the earliest versions blended wool and silk. Who would think to marry those two? Yet they proved the old adage: opposites attract.

This fabric was designed as a workhorse. Laborers needed clothing that could take a beating and keep coming back. Denim delivered. Railroad workers and manual laborers across France embraced it because it held up to anything the workday demanded.

Denim originated in Nîmes, France — hence “de Nîmes,” which became “denim.” Nîmes sits in southern France and carries a distinctly Roman feel in its architecture. It was a major city in the Roman Empire, nestled between hills and plains, with roots reaching back to the Bronze Age. After the Roman conquest, the Arena of Nîmes was built around 100 AD and remains beautifully preserved today. If you want a Roman gladiator experience, go to Nîmes.

Just be sure to wear your jeans.

For more reflections on history, culture, and the psychology of everyday objects, explore articles on Psychology Today and research from Greater Good Science Center.

If you are exploring how memory, identity, or personal history shapes your present life, therapy can help you understand and deepen those connections. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight, resilience, and growth.