Skip to content

Written by Online therapist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

MUSIC AS A MIRROR

MUSIC AS A MIRROR

Emotion, Memory, and the Soundtrack of Connection

Music doesn’t just play—it reflects. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how music mirrors our moods, shapes our environments, and connects us across generations and life stages.

Music serves all kinds of purposes. Fancy restaurants play music in the background or even provide live music on occasion. The function of that soft music in the restaurant is to help you transition from your busy day into a relaxed mood. The more you are relaxed, the more you are likely to spend on food and drink. This background music is really functional.

The music you hear in the mall is designed to do something similar. The goal is to slow you down. When your pace slows, you are more likely to window shop and then walk into the store. Your pace through the store is likely to match the rhythm of the music, giving you time to look and imagine yourself in that dress or using that device that is quite expensive but very interesting. You are more likely to pause and ask questions of the store owner because the music lulls you into a slower pace. Your heart rate slows, and you are in the mood to peruse the racks and shelves. How often have you gone into a store with no intent to buy and come out with something that you love?

The music we choose to play in the car or at home reflects our mood and our need for stimulation. Yesterday, I was doing a sewing project with my granddaughter, and she put what I would call “elevator music” on her phone and then commented that she used this type of background music for times when she needed to concentrate on the task at hand. This was her go-to background music for doing homework!

Music can take us to many different places. Find a station that plays “oldies” from the ’60s, and I am transported back to high school. That is tons of fun because I know all the lyrics and love to sing along. Switch to a modern station, and I know nothing! Taylor Swift and Lady Gaga are a mystery to me. While my granddaughters know every lyric, I am lost. Music is a central part of our being.

What music attracts you? I am drawn to the Baroque era and love the music of the harpsichord. Do you even know what a harpsichord is? How about an Ottavino? This is the “laptop” version of the harpsichord. So, if your apartment or home is too small to house a harpsichord, you can always learn to play the Ottavino!

So many instruments are portable, and that makes them fun. Do you play a harmonica? Do you play a guitar or banjo? Having an instrument readily available is great fun for you and others. Music speaks to us in new ways and connects us with others. The joy of music is connected to early learning as well. Elderly patients with dementia who have not spoken for years can be brought back to life through the singing of early childhood songs. The ability to connect with others is powerful, and music can often be the key!

Want to explore how music mirrors emotion and memory? Visit Rolling Out’s guide to music and emotional connection, Psychology Today’s breakdown of how we experience music, and Reality Pathing’s insights on lyrics and emotional resonance.

If you’re reflecting on music, memory, or emotional connection, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and creative renewal.

related blog post by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Read more of my stories and reflections

A woman waiting for her friend while beginning to watch the sunset at the end of the leap year wearing a poodle skirt, symbolizing time, choice, and personal reflection in Maryland and DC.

Graduation | Why Every Milestone Marks a New Beginning

Why Every Ending Is Also a Beginning What comes to mind when you think of graduation? How many times have you graduated? And how many milestones still lie ahead? Before looking forward, it helps to reflect on the graduations you’ve already experienced. Today, graduations are celebrated for many things. I
Read My Post
A folded paper cootie catcher resting on a table, symbolizing creativity and unfolding potential.

Unfolding Potential | What a Cootie Catcher Teaches Us

How Simple Creations Like A Cootie Catcher Reveal Memory, Meaning, and the Power of Imagination Do you know what a “cootie catcher” is? Your brain may be wondering why that memory surfaced — and that’s exactly the point. The mind stores experiences in surprising places. Something you encountered decades ago
Read My Post
Woman waiting for two friends over coffee in vanishing forests, symbolizing emotional connection and trust in Maryland and DC

Wild Flowers | What Childhood Fields and Vanishing Forests Teach Us

What Childhood Fields, Forest Floors, and Vanishing Forests Teach Us Yesterday, I heard a speaker talk about flower arranging for large banquets and public spaces. As the complicated designs flashed on the screen, I found myself thinking about the fields of flowers I remember from childhood. Driving down a country
Read My Post
Person reading short story about family gathered around a dinner table with laughter and conversation to figure out what is worth doing, symbolizing emotional connection in Maryland and DC.

What Is Worth Doing, Even If You Think You Might Fail?

WHAT IS WORTH DOING, EVEN IF YOU THINK YOU MIGHT FAIL? Risk, Purpose, and the Quiet Power of Courage Failure isn’t the opposite of success—it’s often the path to it. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how meaningful risk-taking stretches our emotional capacity, deepens our purpose, and
Read My Post