Skip to content

Written by Online therapist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

MUSIC AS A MIRROR

MUSIC AS A MIRROR

Emotion, Memory, and the Soundtrack of Connection

Music doesn’t just play—it reflects. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how music mirrors our moods, shapes our environments, and connects us across generations and life stages.

Music serves all kinds of purposes. Fancy restaurants play music in the background or even provide live music on occasion. The function of that soft music in the restaurant is to help you transition from your busy day into a relaxed mood. The more you are relaxed, the more you are likely to spend on food and drink. This background music is really functional.

The music you hear in the mall is designed to do something similar. The goal is to slow you down. When your pace slows, you are more likely to window shop and then walk into the store. Your pace through the store is likely to match the rhythm of the music, giving you time to look and imagine yourself in that dress or using that device that is quite expensive but very interesting. You are more likely to pause and ask questions of the store owner because the music lulls you into a slower pace. Your heart rate slows, and you are in the mood to peruse the racks and shelves. How often have you gone into a store with no intent to buy and come out with something that you love?

The music we choose to play in the car or at home reflects our mood and our need for stimulation. Yesterday, I was doing a sewing project with my granddaughter, and she put what I would call “elevator music” on her phone and then commented that she used this type of background music for times when she needed to concentrate on the task at hand. This was her go-to background music for doing homework!

Music can take us to many different places. Find a station that plays “oldies” from the ’60s, and I am transported back to high school. That is tons of fun because I know all the lyrics and love to sing along. Switch to a modern station, and I know nothing! Taylor Swift and Lady Gaga are a mystery to me. While my granddaughters know every lyric, I am lost. Music is a central part of our being.

What music attracts you? I am drawn to the Baroque era and love the music of the harpsichord. Do you even know what a harpsichord is? How about an Ottavino? This is the “laptop” version of the harpsichord. So, if your apartment or home is too small to house a harpsichord, you can always learn to play the Ottavino!

So many instruments are portable, and that makes them fun. Do you play a harmonica? Do you play a guitar or banjo? Having an instrument readily available is great fun for you and others. Music speaks to us in new ways and connects us with others. The joy of music is connected to early learning as well. Elderly patients with dementia who have not spoken for years can be brought back to life through the singing of early childhood songs. The ability to connect with others is powerful, and music can often be the key!

Want to explore how music mirrors emotion and memory? Visit Rolling Out’s guide to music and emotional connection, Psychology Today’s breakdown of how we experience music, and Reality Pathing’s insights on lyrics and emotional resonance.

If you’re reflecting on music, memory, or emotional connection, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and creative renewal.

related blog post by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Read more of my stories and reflections

Person watching a Monarch butterfly perched on a flower, symbolizing memory, seasonal change and emotional transformation in Maryland and DC.

Letting Go | A Reflection on Seasonal Change, Memory, and Holding On

Why Seasonal Change Still Tugs at Us Long After Childhood Ahh. Summer is over, and fall is attempting to appear. However, with global warming, fall may be delayed as the heat continues to wrap around the block. The end of summer and the return to school mark a cycle that
Read My Post
A woman sitting outside listening to wind chimes on Lazy Summer Days thinking about her health, symbolizing emotional warmth and friendship in Maryland and DC.

Wind Chimes | From Ancient Warnings to Modern Music in the Breeze

From Ancient Warnings to Modern Music in the Breeze Wind chimes come in all shapes and sizes, made from every material imaginable. The earliest versions, of course, were created from whatever was readily available. If you were a caveman, what did you have on hand? Bones. The remains of animals
Read My Post
summer friends, two boys discovering the power of playing games and speaking while a parent watches patiently, symbolizing raising Boys’ Emotional Development, of boys cry, and emotional disconnection in Maryland and DC.

DO BOYS CRY?

Do Boys Cry And What That Means for a Generation of Emotional Health Hi everyone, I recently joined a conversation on Fit for Joy exploring one of the most important and often overlooked issues in emotional development: how boys are taught to restrict their emotional expression from an early age,
Read My Post
Woman reading about a newborn baby crying in a delivery room, symbolizing emotional insight and healing in Maryland and DC.

Emotional Insight – The Lesson Calculus Couldn’t Teach Featured Interview on an Unexpected Path Toward Helping People Grow through Emotional Insight Hello, I wanted to share a recent interview I was part of titled The Lesson Calculus Couldn’t Teach: How Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst Built a Career Helping People Grow. In
Read My Post