Skip to content

Written by Online therapist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Welcome to the Garden | What Gardens Teach Us About Family, Growth, and Renewal

What Gardens, and Families, Teach Us About Growth, Care, and Renewal

How many of you have a garden? That could mean a big plot in the backyard or a planter on the windowsill in your kitchen. Gardens come in all shapes and sizes. Yours may be indoors or outdoors. The joy of a garden transcends size. It may hold vegetables, flowers, exotic plants, or herbs. The delight of a garden is that you get to choose.

Regardless of the type of garden you enjoy, they all take work. This is the season to begin tending your garden. Our backyard houses a “moon garden,” filled with flowers that bloom white. In the evening, as the moon rises, the white blossoms catch the light. The joy of this sight is deeply satisfying. You would be surprised by how many flowers bloom in white.

The beds in the front of the house are filled with color, while those in the back wait for evening to show off their blooms.

I wonder if life has a similar pattern.

The early part of life is loud and boisterous. The cry of a newborn can shatter the sound barrier at any hour. A toddler’s squeals make you laugh. The thunderous motion of a young child can make your head spin. As children find their voices, you hear the music of independence and protest, followed by conviction and commitment as they move forward with their own lives. Then the cycle begins again as grandchildren enter the world.

The parallels are obvious. A garden and a family both require planning and careful tending in order to thrive. You cannot be rough with the soil or the plants. You must be vigilant to spot a new weed creeping in. During difficult or dry periods, you must pay extra attention and gently feed the tender plants to help them sustain themselves through those times.

A garden is complex and requires careful attention. The time, energy, and expense all come together to give you pleasure and validate the effort you have invested.

Enjoy your garden, big or small.

For more reflections on growth, family life, and emotional development, explore articles on Psychology Today and research from Greater Good Science Center.

If you are tending to your own “inner garden” and seeking support in navigating family dynamics or personal growth, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional resilience, connection, and renewal.

related blog post by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Read more of my stories and reflections

A person writing an apology note after being caught in scams, symbolizing vulnerability, emotional growth, ICBM, and conscience in Maryland and DC.

Scams

SCAMS Deception, Vulnerability, and the Emotional Toll of Being Fooled Scams aren’t just financial—they’re emotional invasions. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how scams exploit trust, trigger shame, and fracture relationships, and why emotional recovery is just as vital as financial repair. Ahh! That is no doubt
Read My Post
Woman sitting on a sofa with familiar routines with her daughter thinking on how No One Prepares Us to Parent , symbolizing reflection and reconnection during marriage in the age of COVID-19, with therapy support in Maryland and DC.

No One Prepares Us to Parent, Why the Most Important Job Has No Training

When No One Prepares Us To Parent, The Most Important Job We Do Come With the Least Training Parenting shapes generations, yet most of us enter it with nothing more than instinct, memory, and whatever modeling we absorbed, healthy or not, from the adults who raised us. When you think
Read My Post
Person reading about an elderly couple smiling on a porch, symbolizing Real Commitment and emotional connection in Maryland and DC.

Understanding Real Commitment | Love Is a Decision

Why Real Love Requires Choice, Real Commitment, and Courage I know that you feel love, and that the sensation is thrilling when it happens. There is the immediate attraction to someone who throws you for a loop and makes your heart pound. There is the joy of seeing your child
Read My Post
Woman in New England healing from surgery and reading with her dog after Groundhog Day, symbolizing emotional renewal and a new beginning in Maryland and DC.

Spring Cleaning | Why Clearing Space Brings Emotional Renewal

Why Clearing Space, Inside and Out, Feels So Good and Brings Emotional Renewal Check your emotional reaction to that title. Some people respond with enthusiasm, eager for warmer weather, open windows, birdsong, and the ritual of sorting closets. I recently examined my own closet—not to clean it, but because I
Read My Post