Skip to content

Written by Online therapist Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Layers

What Snow, Cake, and Life All Have in Common – Layers

Some winters reveal more than weather. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how layers, of snow, of tradition, of experience—shape the landscapes around us and the lives within us.

We still have mountains of snow with no sign of thawing or melting. This is the weirdest snow I have ever seen. It acts like concrete. From my perch in the sunroom, I watch a young man cross the yard of the house on the corner across the street, and he is walking on top of the snow. If I were not seeing it with my own eyes, I would not believe it. The snow is a couple of feet deep, and he is walking on top of it. Clearly, this stuff is odd.

The top layer is about seven inches deep. Looking at the slabs that the snowplow has thrown up, the crust is quite deep, like a solid piece of concrete. One can expect this stuff to take a long time to melt. In the meantime, I hope it is fertilizing the grass underneath. I know this stuff gathers nutrients as it falls from the sky, so I hope those “guys” are doing their job on the lawn below.

Snow is not the only thing that comes in layers. Most of life comes in layers. You might think of your life as a series of layers, like a Smith Island Cake. Do you know about this cake? It is actually famous, at least around here, and I hear that they will ship it all over the country.

Smith Island is an old fishing village in the Chesapeake Bay. It is the last inhabited offshore island in the Bay and is still accessible only by boat. This little place has a deep tradition of crabbing and oystering, as the Bay has long been known for these delicious treats. The addition of a sweet treat to match the seafood is not surprising. The Smith Island Cake is Maryland’s official dessert. Does your state have an official dessert? This cake can have ten or more thin layers with yummy icing between them. When you are visiting the Eastern Shore, be sure to indulge.

The layers of your life can be yummy or crummy. Most of the time, life is a mixture of both. The layers of the Smith Island Cake are separated by icing, a gooey substance meant to cushion and stabilize the layers. Life has similar “icing,” meant to give respite, time for reflection, and recovery or reorganization, so that the next phase of life can have a completely different flavor.

Want to explore more about resilience, reflection, and the layers that shape emotional well‑being? Visit Psychology Today’s reflections on personal growth and Greater Good’s research on meaning‑making and life transitions.

If this reflection inspires you to explore the layers of your own life—past, present, and emerging—therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support clarity, resilience, and renewal.

related blog post by Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, Ph.D.

Read more of my stories and reflections

A woman sitting outside in fall thinking about her health, symbolizing emotional warmth and friendship in Maryland and DC.

Health

One Body, One Chance, Let’s Treat Get Your Health Right Health isn’t just a checklist, it’s a relationship with your body. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores the excuses we make, the risks we take, and the simple truths that can lead to lasting change. When was
Read My Post
A journal and pen beside a warm mug, symbolizing end of the year reflection and emotional growth in Maryland and DC.

Growing | How Self‑Reflection Fuels Emotional Growth

How Self‑Reflection Helps Us Stretch Beyond Who We’ve Been and Helps Emotional Growth Are you growing? Not in height, most of us are headed in the opposite direction as the years go by, but in emotional depth, clarity, and self‑understanding. Are you growing? If you think I am talking about
Read My Post
Couple joined in gratitude having a a heart to heart about being a grandparent and parenting our parents, symbolizing emotional connection in Maryland and DC.

Parenting Our Parents | When Roles Reverse and Care Comes Full Circle

When We Start Parenting Our Parents, Is When the Circle of Care Turns Back Toward Us There is a moment in many adults’ lives when the roles quietly reverse. The people who once cared for us now need our care, and the emotional weight of that shift is profound. I
Read My Post
Cozy night setting during ice storm after sledding, symbolizing nighttime safety with snowflakes outside, vulnerability, and emotional impact in Maryland and DC.

Sledding

Snow, Speed, Sledding, and the Memories That Stay With Us Winter has a way of pulling us back into childhood. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection celebrates the thrill of sledding, the joy of shared moments, and the timeless magic of snow‑covered hills. “Rosebud.” Does that ring a
Read My Post