Support, Discovery, and the Power of Emotional Contact
Protection isn’t just defense, it’s connection. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how early relationships shape our sense of safety, and how emotional support can transform isolation into belonging.
Protection is such an interesting word. You can take it apart: Pro and Tection.
The Pro part is straightforward and reflects support. The Tection has two interesting possibilities. It could be seen as a misspelling of detection or taction. If detection is the intent, then we are focusing on finding or discovering. If taction is the intent, then we are focusing on touch or being in contact with something.
Let’s look at the options. I could be supporting someone or something with the intent of discovery. Or I could be supporting with the intent to influence or emotionally touch someone.
No matter how I experience this word, I am interacting with someone or something. The word is dynamic. Interaction forms the basis of our existence. We are born dependent on those around us. Interaction is necessary for survival. The type of interaction will shape how I move through the world and what I expect from it.
If my caregivers are kind and loving, I will expect the world to receive me and be interested in me. I will move into the world with interest and curiosity. I don’t need to be bold, just active. Action will put me in touch with various parts of my world. I will encounter people, places, and things.
If my caregivers are neglectful or aggressive, I will likely do one of two things. I will withdraw and isolate myself for protection, or I will push forward and attack others before they can attack me. Neither of these approaches is healthy.
There is a connection between how I relate to the world and my overall well-being. Both withdrawal and aggression are high-risk ways of relating to the world around me. My body and brain need connection that nurtures and supports me. Withdrawal and attack do not leave room for either need.
Children who fall into this latter category need protection and support. Sometimes that comes from a neighboring family. Many times, I have heard stories of neighbors being a “second family.” The adult sitting in my office has fond memories of that neighboring family, where they retreated for peace, support, comfort, or simply to escape.
When our own families are chaotic or dangerous, we are grateful for the neighbor or relative who sees our need and accepts our presence as if we had always belonged there.
Protection: the positive intent to find support and comfort in relationships with others.
Want to explore how early relationships shape emotional safety and resilience? Visit Psychology Today’s article on early attachment and adult relationships and Greater Good’s guide to emotional safety in relationships.
If you’re navigating emotional vulnerability, relational trauma, or the need for support, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support healing, connection, and emotional clarity.
By Dr. Gloria K Vanderhorst