CLINGING TO THE STATUS QUO
Comfort, Curiosity, and the Courage to Explore
Familiarity feels safe—but growth lives just beyond it. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how our attachment to routine can soothe us, but also limit us, and how small acts of curiosity can unlock new dimensions of joy and resilience.
Yes. You know what I am talking about!
The familiar is so comfy and cozy. I’ll bet you have some favorites. Let’s see.
- Do you have a favorite blanket?
- Do you have a favorite chair or spot in the house?
- Do you have a favorite place that you like to go for food or fun?
See. I knew you had favorites. Now you probably do not think of yourself as “clinging” to these things. That is a verb that conjures up a sense of desperation or some last-ditch effort to meet a need. Clinging smacks of being overly dependent. On the other hand, if you are a fashion model then clinging is a desirable trait. “The gown was clinging to her body in a sensuous and glamorous way.” Now, that is an incredibly positive use of the verb.
Change can be hard, and it can be surprising. Change contains a piece of the unknown and most of us like the familiar. We take a sense of comfort and security out of the familiar. We all need comfort and, in that way, embracing the familiar is truly positive. Yet, we can let that attachment block us from considering something new or innovative. When was the last time you embraced something new? How often have you gone in search of a new method or process? When your friend wants to try a new restaurant, are you excited, or do you wish you did not have to drive that far or adjust to a new place?
Take a moment and think about the “regular” things that you do. How many of you go to the same place for vacation? Buy your clothes from the same store? Order in from the same restaurant? All of these satisfy our need for safety.
We also have a need for adventure and variety. Many of us fail to explore this part of ourselves. Yet, there are numerous ways to do this and still maintain a sense of safety. Think about the book genre that you enjoy. Explore new reading territory. You may be surprised that your taste in literature can change. Think about the TV shows that you gravitate to and explore new types of entertainment. Think about the music you play and try new tunes.
Challenging your brain to address fresh territory is healthy. You are less likely to get Alzheimer’s if you challenge your brain to explore fresh territory. Our brains are huge, and we use so little of that storage and problem-solving space. Learn a new game. Try new types of music. Learn a new language. Explore!
Want to explore how comfort zones shape behavior and how to break free? Visit Made Up Mind’s guide to overcoming status quo bias and Observing Myself’s questions for challenging the status quo.
If you’re ready to stretch beyond the familiar and explore new emotional territory, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and personal expansion.
By Dr. Gloria K Vanderhorst
