Author: Dr. Gloria K Vanderhorst

SITTING AND NOT WANTING TO LEAVE

Connection, Grace, and the Gift of Lingering

Some moments ask us to stay. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how deep friendships and shared presence remind us that emotional connection is not just a need—it’s a sacred experience.

I hope you’ve had the experience of sitting with friends and not wanting the moment to end. We are born connected. How many times have I repeated that phrase to myself and in my writings? We are born connected and spend the rest of our lives seeking connections with others. A connection is such a natural thing. As an embryo, the connection is a lifeline that feeds, nurtures, and assures us that more connections will come. As we float in amniotic fluid, we hear the sounds of another world beyond the one we inhabit. Perhaps the sounds are muffled, but they are interesting and intriguing, and we long to know more about them. We want to explore the outer world and discover what lies beyond.

As we sit with friends, we feel the connection and the desire to remain connected. Too many days and weeks have passed since we last saw each other. We love each other, and we want to nurture our love and respect for one another. We trust each other and know our words will be respected and cherished. We laugh at stories of the past and present. We delve into histories that are joyous and tragic. We understand. We respect. And most of all, we cherish these pieces of each other as though they were precious gems to be honored and carefully placed in our jewelry boxes, safekept in our hearts. We love each other.

That love does not gush all over the room. Our love is gentle and tender. We deeply respect each other and want each other to flourish and be healthy. We respect the limits inherent in each of us and offer assistance. We know it will one day be reciprocated.

The place where we gather expects us to be there on a regular basis. They allow us to linger, acknowledging that we haven’t been together for some time. They are patient and gracious as we stay, laugh, and tell more stories. The laughter rises in the room and spills across the balconies on the second floor. Fortunately, the place is clearing as the lunch crowd exits. We can see the staff clearing the tables and readying the place for the dinner crowd that will appear within two to three hours. Yet, we are not ready. We linger and are accepted as truants. Just a patient acceptance and recognition of the importance of this meeting. Grace is precious.

Friends are perfect!

Want to explore how emotional presence and connection shape well-being? Visit Dr. Vanderhorst’s original post on Sitting and Not Wanting to Leave, Psych Central’s guide to emotional presence and abandonment, and Psychology Today’s insights on relational energy and emotional fatigue.

If you’re reflecting on connection, emotional presence, or relational healing, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and interpersonal growth.

AWARENESS

Presence, Curiosity, and the Mindful Mirror of Technology

Awareness isn’t just noticing—it’s choosing how to respond. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how awareness shapes our relationships, our learning, and our evolving dance with artificial intelligence.

We are all familiar with this word. However, have you ever really stopped to figure out what it truly means? The police caution us to be aware of our surroundings. Our friends wonder if we are aware of something that is happening in the social group. Our spiritual guides want us to be mindful of other dimensions beyond ourselves. The neighborhood naturalist wants us to know about the flora and fauna and how we care for other creatures. The full-length mirror in my bedroom wants me to be aware of how I look. My colleagues want me to be mindful of my impact on others. My mother, if she were still here, would want me to be aware of my language and what I am eating.

Awareness is a state of being. Mahatma Gandhi has a quote that illustrates awareness for me: “Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.” If you were to die tomorrow, what would today look like? Your first thought might be that you would eat as much ice cream as you could. However, your next thought will go to the connections that you have made with others. You will want to be with those you love and spend time connecting, remembering, and advising. You will want to laugh and cry. Would you pick up a book to learn one last thing? How much time do you devote to learning in your current living state? Are you curious about a variety of areas of life and knowledge? Do you challenge yourself to investigate new concepts such as Artificial Intelligence? Let awareness inspire your curiosity and drive your quest for knowledge, including understanding the implications of AI on human interactions.

Artificial Intelligence, or AI, is everywhere. When I draft an email, the AI highlights better phrasing or catches misspelled words. This thing is fast, too. I must admit that I have relaxed into it and appreciate the errors it quickly catches. However, I am not sure I know what will happen next or where this intelligence is leading. Robots in fast food places that man the fryer can save humans from grease burns and provide a financial break for the store owner, leading to more profits. And, yes, I have seen the clips where robots learn to play soccer. However, I cannot imagine going to the stadium or the ice rink to watch a bunch of robots engage in a sport. But that is where this innovation will lead. In the future, AI is expected to revolutionize various industries, from healthcare to transportation, and even create new job opportunities in fields we can’t yet imagine.

Want to explore how mindfulness enhances awareness in the age of AI? Visit IOSM’s guide to mindfulness and ethical AI, DailyHuman’s overview of mindful AI development, and Mindful Institute’s reflections on mindfulness in an AI future.

If you’re reflecting on awareness, technology, or emotional presence, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and mindful living.

MUSIC

Memory, Meaning, and the Soundtrack of the Mind

Music doesn’t just echo—it imprints. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how melodies become emotional bookmarks, and how the brain’s vast musical archive reveals the depth of our lived experience.

Recently, I have been waking up with a song in my head. The tune can vary widely. Today, it was an early nursery rhyme tune. Other days, it has been rock ‘n roll from the sixties or classical pieces. The sheer diversity of these tunes, all stored in my brain, is a wonder. And it is not just me—your brain has a similar library. The question that lingers is, where does it keep all this? The brain, it seems, holds onto everything. Now, I am left pondering if there is a discernible pattern or reason for when it retrieves items from its vast storage locker. I wonder what I have been doing recently that generates this look back into music I have enjoyed. I am challenging myself to learn a new instrument and perhaps that is what my brain is focused on. Yet, what message is it trying to send or emphasize by resurrecting these old tunes? And why has my brain stored all this old music?

I belong to an organization with a storage unit that keeps old records. Recently, the group had to get a larger unit as we ran out of space. This prompted a review and purging of old records. Do we need the minutes from every meeting known to man or woman? When someone decided to keep the fancy napkins from luncheons two decades ago, do we honor that choice? Or what about the collection of hats that the instructor wore to each early luncheon? You can see where I am going here. The storage locker is growing, but my brain has limited space. Though certain sci-fi movies show aliens with expanded odd-shaped heads, I cannot expand my skull. Remember the ‘Coneheads’ skits and films? Saturday Night Live had fun with them, and State Farm used them for an ad campaign. We can always keep buying bigger storage units for our junk and stuff, but my skull will not allow my brain to grow bigger. This realization leads me to a profound respect for my brain’s storage capacity.

All my experiences are stored somewhere in my brain, and the reality of that statement is formidable in the true sense of the word. Someday, we may be able to access that storage unit at will. Right now, we must be content with what our brain throws out in dreams or at odd times throughout the day. I have settled on being curious and fascinated with what my brain presents. It seems to wander through various life stages, topics, and experiences. Right now, I must accept what it chooses to throw in my path. Of course, I could go fishing for specific associations but there is no guarantee that my brain will open on command. Right now, I will accept being intrigued by the songs that appear in the morning or the scenes that float by at night.

Want to explore how music connects memory, emotion, and cognition? Visit Psych Central’s guide to music and emotional processing, APA’s podcast on music, memory, and imagination, and Biology Insights’ overview of music imagery and brain function.

If you’re reflecting on creativity, emotional memory, or personal growth, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and creative renewal.

KALEIDOSCOPE

Perspective, Complexity, and the Beauty of Change

Life isn’t static—it’s a shifting mosaic. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how the kaleidoscope becomes a metaphor for emotional complexity, personal growth, and the power of perspective.

Do you remember this marvelous toy? I remember receiving one of these for a birthday when I was maybe 10 years old and how fascinating this tube was. Of course, as a child, I got this cardboard tube filled at one end with colorful crystals that you could hear rolling around as you turned the collar and viewed the changing color combinations through the other end. This is often a metaphor for life itself.

We look from one perspective or angle, yet the reality is more complex, colorful, and changeable than we can imagine. Each of our worlds is complex. We have childhood histories, relationship histories, internal experiences, hopes, dreams, and challenges. Our world, internally and externally, is complex. Some of us embrace the complexity and dive into it as interesting or fascinating. Others get trapped in the bits and pieces of odd shapes and sharp corners. Where are you?

Life is complex. Life has always been complex. Just think of the beginning of this story. You come into the world with no ability to feed yourself, clothe yourself, or clearly communicate your needs. YIKES! That is some beginning. Interfacing with the world around us is necessary for survival. How we do that, even in infancy, is enormously important. We are dependent creatures, and as we grow, others become dependent on us. We are truly a collection of colorful pieces and parts that can be interesting and attractive or sharp and blinding. How are you approaching your life? How are you experiencing the world around you? Every moment of the day, we make choices that influence how we experience the world. Take one day and pay close attention to the numerous choices that you make.

You have more options than you may think. The picture that you see can change. Just turn the collar on the tube.

Want to explore how kaleidoscope symbolism reflects emotional complexity and transformation? Visit The Mindful Word’s metaphorical guide to the kaleidoscope of mind, EC Blog’s deep dive into kaleidoscope symbolism across cultures, and Forbes’ reflection on perspective and personal growth.

If you’re reflecting on complexity, perspective, or emotional transformation, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and life-stage renewal.

GOOD COMMUNICATION

Connection, Clarity, and the Courage to Speak

Communication isn’t just a skill—it’s a lifeline. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how emotional health depends on honest expression, and how learning to speak up is an act of self-respect and relational care.

We are dependent on communication with others. If we do not communicate well with others, we tend to withdraw, feel depressed, and isolate ourselves. We are truly social beings, and we crave connection with others. Even shy and withdrawn, we still need connections to maintain our identity.

Poor communication can damage our health. When we avoid communicating our needs and wants, we unknowingly hold tension in our bodies, which can lead to a variety of problems. This tension is a physical manifestation of our emotional state. Our muscles contract slightly, changing our posture, comfort, and bodily orientation. Our bodies are not designed to maintain tension for extended periods. We ‘hold things in’ to our own detriment.

We have not been well trained on how to communicate with others. Think about your habits. When something “bugs” you, how long do you wait before you let the other person know? How do you communicate your experience? Here is what is expected: When you do not like the action of another, you complain to yourself, then you complain to someone else, and then you think that that has given you relief, and you avoid talking to the person who is bugging you. This avoidance is detrimental to both mental and physical health.

Effective communication is risk-savvy. Figure out what you need to share. Look at the relationship with the person you need to talk to. Choose the time and place for effective communication. Think through your story. Share with the expectation that you will be heard and honored and that the two of you will be able to find common ground, respect each other, and generate a new way of communicating. Too often, we fear our needs will not be met and avoid thinking through how to communicate what we need. We do ourselves a disservice, and we do the other a disservice as well.

Honest communication will bring us closer together as we gain clarity on how the other feels, how they experience us, and how we experience them. I think that one of the reasons we avoid honest communication about our needs is that we grow up in families where the parents have not been well trained on how to communicate with young children. We tend not to take children seriously, think their needs carry minimal weight in the face of all adult responsibilities, and set their communications aside. Children are genuinely transparent and deserve to have their voices heard. Problem-solving with a child can be very satisfying. When you were a child, the experience of not being taken seriously can have long-lasting consequences.

Take yourself seriously. Consider how you feel, what you want to say, and what outcome you would like. Prepare to advocate for yourself. That means thinking through the communication, selecting the time and place, and being confident that your request is reasonable. Effective communication is how you value yourself.

Want to explore how communication supports emotional health? Visit Methodist Health’s guide to communication and mental health, Verywell Mind’s overview of mindful communication, and Positive Psychology’s techniques for fostering healthy communication.

If you’re reflecting on communication, boundaries, or emotional clarity, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and relational growth.

THE PARTY LINE

Connection, Courtesy, and the Lost Art of Waiting

Before smartphones, there was shared silence. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how party lines taught patience, cooperation, and emotional intelligence—lessons we still need in our hyper-connected world.

Anything can be fixed with good communication. I grew up in the era of party lines for the telephone. For those of you who do not know what that means, I will explain. In the forties and beyond, telephone lines were shared among several households, and real people sat at switchboards in specific locations to facilitate these calls as necessary. The phones themselves were large contraptions that you hung on the wall or sat on a table or telephone stand that had a small chair attached. You would commonly pick up the receiver and find a conversation between two other people. You either hung up quickly and waited a while before trying again, or you asked the current parties how long they would be or told them you had an emergency and needed to use the line. You could not use that last one very often, or you would get completely ignored.

Kids often liked to quietly sneak the receiver off the hook and listen to the conversations. Invariably, they would give themselves away by giggling or snickering. The parties would chastise them and yell at them to get off the line. When you got caught by your parents, you would really be in trouble for breaking the telephone etiquette. Party lines taught you to wait and be patient, courteous to others even if you did not know them, and cede time to others.

The elements of effective communication are illustrated in the party line. One: You were connected to others, even if you did not know them personally. Boy, is that true today! We are connected to and dependent on others for everything. Go to the grocery store. Fruit, vegetables, meat, and cheese are trucked in from various places. Fruit used to come from the orchard in the backyard, vegetables from the garden in the side yard, and meat from the cow in the field. Without the dependence on others that exists today, we could not feed ourselves. Garden spaces are exceedingly rare. Some neighborhoods and high rises have garden plots that you can rent or use, but there would never be enough vegetables if the delivery trucks were not coming to the grocery store.

Second, the party line required cooperation and courtesy. Today, our sense of cooperation is present but often not obvious. We depend on others for many things, but we often do not have direct connections. I know that in my neighborhood, I wave to others as we cross paths, but I rarely know who they really are or have extensive conversations. We are connected by covenants and respect for the streets and properties. We tend to apply our sense of cooperation to organizations beyond our immediate locations by supporting non-profits or volunteering at the soup kitchen. As we build relationships through organizations, we expand our reach beyond our neighborhoods. Helping others takes on a new dimension.

Third, the party line taught us respect and patience. Waiting for others to complete their conversation and taking your turn is never easy, and respecting the needs and timing of others can be difficult. Patience is often difficult, especially with young children. Remember when they wanted to tie their shoes or put their coat on alone? That was hard. You could always do it faster, yet the wait was more respectful.

Want to explore the history and etiquette of party lines? Visit Wikipedia’s overview of party line telephony, Southern Living’s reflections on shared phone lines, and Country Adventures’ list of forgotten party line etiquette rules.

If you’re reflecting on communication, connection, or emotional patience, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and relational growth.

ON ICE

Glide, Grit, and the Glory of the Game

Ice isn’t just cold—it’s electric. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how childhood wonder meets athletic mastery, and how skating through life’s challenges can lead to record-breaking triumphs.

One of my favorite Christmases as a child was the year that everyone got ice skates. They were beautiful white high-top boots with a crisp steel blade the length of the sole. I was mesmerized. I had never tried ice skating, but I was sure I would overtake Sonja Henie. A girl can dream. Fortunately, the local reservoir was not far away, and a frozen surface was guaranteed with Indiana winters. Lacing up those boots and toddling onto the ice with trepidation and anticipation was the height of glory. With stable ankles and knees, standing on the center of the blades was easy, and a slight push from the knee down to the frozen water started the glide. What a glorious feeling!

Today, I discovered that Alex Ovechkin has tied Wayne Gretzky’s all-time record for goals. He matched the long-standing record set by Gretzky in 1994, which had previously broken Gordie Howe’s record from 1963. The fact that Ovechkin accomplished this in a year when he also broke his leg is genuinely remarkable. Congratulations, Mr. Ovechkin! You must be beyond thrilled. Breaking the record is inevitable, and another celebration is just around the corner.

If I have done the math correctly, it took 31 years for Gretzky to break Howe’s record and another 31 years for Ovechkin to break Gretzky’s. Spooky! That means Alex Ovechkin will be 70 years old when his record is broken!

I am in awe of the skill it takes to put those skates on and whack a puck along the ice while a giant monster guards the net. The fact that anyone scores a goal ever is fantastic. The strength and coordination required to power down the ice while wielding a large wooden stick in search of a tiny black circle is beyond impressive. No wonder the crowd goes wild when the puck enters the net. Statistically, this should never happen. No wonder it takes 31 years to break a record.

Congratulations, Mr. Ovechkin! The honor is well deserved.

Want to explore the legacy of hockey’s greatest scorers? Visit Wikipedia’s list of NHL individual records, Hudson Reporter’s highlights of historic hockey milestones, and The Show VDG Sports’ deep dive into NHL history.

If you’re reflecting on childhood joy, athletic inspiration, or personal milestones, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and life-stage transformation.

OLD KITCHEN TOOLS

Heirlooms, Renewal, Hidden Talents, and the Crank That Still Turns

Some tools feed more than the body—they nourish memory. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how vintage kitchen tools connect us to family, creativity, and the talents we’ve tucked away for too long.

What old kitchen tools do you have from your grandmother, grandfather, or other relatives? Recently, we had friends over, and they noticed the old meat grinder attached to our pot rack in the kitchen. They also shared that they have an old nut grinder in their kitchen. Who has given you their old kitchen tools that you still hang onto?

This meat grinder was in my grandmother’s kitchen, and I was charged with using it sometime as a child or teen. So, you may be wondering how it ended up in my kitchen. I do have siblings, you know. It could have gone to other places. I know it was in my mother’s kitchen and still in active use there. I do not think it has been active since arriving in my kitchen. I have one vague memory of being challenged by my husband to demonstrate that it worked and successfully pulling that off!

So, how do things end up in your kitchen? You probably have a favorite wooden spoon. I have one that my brother-in-law made. He is a violin bow maker, so kitchen spoons were a bit off track, but one day, he was bored! Of course, the spoon has none of the fancy ivory or gold inlay you find on a violin bow, and I do not think we have ever used it, but it looks lovely.

What hangs around in your world that you have never used? You know the old saying: “Use it or lose it!” We come into the world with what I will call “pre-programmed” talents. Some children are naturally drawn to the piano in the living room. Some are constantly building forts in the backyard or nearby woods. Others love finger paints and graduate to oils or watercolors. We all seek to explore our talents and find uses for these skills, curiosities, and talents that are programmed inside of us.

Some fall by the wayside as we mature, and others become professions that will sustain us forever. Some go dormant and stay hidden away. Who knows the cause of that “hiding”. Someone made fun of how you dressed or wore your hair, so you put that flair for decorating your body away in a storage locker. Perhaps you had a booming voice and were told that you were always too loud so that one went into a soundproof booth. We all have hidden talents. What are yours? It is time to open the locker and let the sound out of the booth. Pick up that flute that you store in the attic. Open the sewing box that you inherited from your great-grandmother. Or turn the crank on the nut grinder!

You are never too old to open your storage locker and rummage around for the talents you have packed away. You might surprise yourself and author a great novel, make a pretty dress, or enjoy grinding nuts.

Want to explore the value and meaning behind vintage kitchen tools? Visit The Spruce Crafts’ guide to collectible kitchen gadgets, Jacqueline Stallone’s identification and value guide, and Craft Your Happy Place’s list of heirlooms worth saving.

If you’re reconnecting with creativity, legacy, or personal expression, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and creative renewal.

AFTER SCHOOL

Memory, Risk, and the Roots of Who We Become

Childhood isn’t just a chapter—it’s the blueprint. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how after-school adventures shape emotional patterns, and how revisiting those moments can unlock healing, insight, and transformation.

Where would we find you after school? What talents did you pursue as a child? I remember one little girl who loved to climb trees until one day, she accepted the challenge of a giant fir tree and found herself stuck at the top. The view was beautiful, but the climb down looked impossible. A few cries for help brought her father with the tall ladder he used to clean the house’s second-story gutters. Being rescued is excellent!

Being adventurous is even greater. Sometimes, we fail to take the risk of climbing tall trees for fear of failure or fear of falling. When have you failed to climb your cedar tree? Who would come to your rescue?

Take a moment and imagine yourself back in childhood, finding that challenge you wanted to take on. Imagine the scene of that first thought. I could… Remember the sequence of events, thoughts, and feelings as you play this through. Do you go forward? Do you hesitate? Do you share the adventure with anyone? How we approach these pieces of childhood is enormously important as they lay the foundation for how we will approach other choices, decisions, and actions in the rest of our lives.

The tree climber will take risks. Sometimes, the tree climber will assess the risks, and sometimes not. Going just for the thrill and the adventure can be motivation enough. Reflecting on outcomes can come with age, but the risk-taker may ignore the potential fall.

Find that younger person inside of you and see what they need. Unbelievably, that part of you has been influencing decisions and behaviors for a long time without your conscious awareness. It is high time to meet this part of you and accept that history. Have a conversation with that part. Learn how it has been holding you back or impelling you forward into some dangerous places. The younger parts of us continue to influence us because they do not know that we got older or grew up in any way. Bringing those younger parts forward is critical. Make friends with your history.

You may remember that I have a friend whose mother told her that she could make friends with “a fly.” So, find those small events and pieces of history impacting your current thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Get to know them. Only then can you decide if you want to keep thinking and behaving in the ways they have programmed for you. You may have thought that the things you did after school were unimportant. However, they form a path that determines where you have ended up. The challenge for all of us is to page back in time, find those crucial pieces of history, and ask how that is showing up in the present for me. We are an incredible collection of our experiences, which influence the present. Learn about them so that you can decide if you want to keep them, modify them, or dismiss them.

Want to explore how childhood experiences shape adult emotional patterns? Visit Psychology Today’s guide to secure attachment and childhood adversity, Neuroscience News’ study on emotional neglect and body trust, and Mayo Clinic’s framework for overcoming adverse childhood experiences.

If you’re reflecting on childhood, emotional patterns, or personal growth, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and developmental healing.

WE ALL KNOW THIS PERSON

Defiance, Attention, and the Emotional Undercurrent of Disruption

Sometimes the flash isn’t just from a camera—it’s from unmet emotional needs. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how rogue behavior at school events may reflect deeper patterns of validation-seeking, and how empathy and frustration often coexist in our reactions.

For those of you who have been to school plays, recitals, and fashion shows from the time your children were in preschool to the time they graduated, I write this piece. At the beginning of the play or performance, the director announces that everyone is to silence their cell phones so as not to disturb the event. Further, they request that you stow your phone. The school will be recording or taking pictures that will be available to everyone the next day on the school website. Everyone complies and stows their phone. Except for that one rogue parent. There is always one rogue parent. What are they thinking?!

During a preschool music performance, I remember one father, cell phone in hand, walking up to the front of the stage mid-performance to snap his darling daughter in the front row. What was he thinking? Where do these people come from? More recently, at a performance, the announcement to silence your phones came with the good news that the performance would be recorded and sent to everyone who had purchased a ticket. That sounded great.

The house lights were dimmed, and the performance was moving along smoothly. The stage was well-lit, the music was grand, and each part was well-played. Then the dreaded “camera parent“ appeared… Standing, clicking, flash going off. What is she thinking? I wonder what her child is thinking. Is it: “Thanks Mom, that makes me feel special.”? Or is it: “Oh no, it’s my mom. I am mortified.” Or is it: “Good grief, I cannot imagine she is doing this again”.

This parent has not only created a dilemma for her child, but she has given the royal “finger” to the audience, the school, and the participants on the stage. Help me out here. What is she thinking? Of course, every other parent in the crowd wanted to photograph their child doing their one valuable line. However, they respected the school’s announcement, put their phones away, and placed them on silence. The request was to focus on the event as it happened and let your heart swell as your child took the stage.

This is what that mother is missing. Her heart is not swelling. Her palms are sweating as she sneaks her camera out and attracts the attention of the audience with the inevitable flash. Yes, she has captured a picture. Yes, she has embarrassed her child. Yes, she has defied the school’s request. And she has robbed herself of that moment of pride when your heart wants to jump out of your chest because you are so proud of your child!

I must wonder about the emotional needs of this parent and how she has been parented. What leads up to this defiance? What is the background that overruns the school’s best intentions? Some part of me wants to reach out to her and say: “I am sorry for whatever that painful history is.” Some part of me just wants to swat her like a fly.

Want to explore how emotionally immature or neglectful parenting shapes adult behavior? Visit Best Therapists’ guide to emotionally immature parents, Psych Central’s breakdown of emotionally neglectful parenting types, and Steve Rose’s insights on healing from emotionally unavailable parents.

If you’re reflecting on emotional needs, parenting patterns, or social behavior, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and relational healing.