Author: Dr. Gloria K Vanderhorst

Humidity – Swamps, Sweat, and the Science of Sticky Air

Humidity isn’t just uncomfortable—it’s a physiological challenge. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how swampy summers affect our bodies, our buildings, and our moods, and why staying cool is more than a luxury—it’s a necessity.

I have decided that humidity is my enemy. Yes, you heard that right. I have chosen a form of weather as my enemy. I live just outside of Washington, D.C. Our nation’s capital is a swamp. I am not referring to the political climate or politicians though that could be a discussion for another time. I am referring to the actual, physical characteristics of this part of the country. Washington, D.C was built on a swamp. Perfect! What better place to put the nation’s capital.

The swamp land along the Potomac River was drained to create space for buildings and roads and homes. Trust me. No matter how you drain a swamp, it is still a swamp. The slightest elevation in humidity results in stifling air and pollution. And again, I am not talking about the politicians. The land, the air, the area along the Potomac River is still a swamp.

This summer the swamp has been performing overtime. The temperature has been high and as it climbs the swamp works to keep up by providing humidity that competes with the temperature. The weather people on the television give warnings to stay inside, assuming you have air conditioning. I had no idea that air conditioning was a universal thing! Without the AC you should not stay inside! That is exactly why most homes used to be built with porches and porticos so that you had a chance to catch a breeze occasionally. Many of these older homes had sleeping porches on the second floor, screened in to keep the bugs out and high up to get a better shot at catching a breeze.

That is exactly why every church had these cardboard fans in the pews so that during the time you were stuck in the building you could generate some air circulation. Windows in office buildings were made to open because most of those buildings were constructed before air conditioning.

Humidity is a serious thing. Being outdoors in high humidity is difficult on your system. Breathing is harder and fatigue sets in earlier. You can get muscle cramps, suffer from hyperthermia and in extreme cases you can get heat stroke. The latter can be deadly. Your body temperature spikes, and you become a furnace causing your body to speed everything up to the point that you cannot tolerate it.

No wonder humidity is my enemy!

Want to explore how humidity affects your health and environment? Visit Verywell Health’s guide to humidity and health risks, HealthPartners’ blog on humidity-related illness, and Houston Methodist’s overview of humidity’s impact.

If the weather is wearing you down emotionally or physically, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support seasonal resilience and emotional clarity.

BACK TO SCHOOL!

Memory, Emotion, and the Calendar That Never Leaves Us

Back-to-school season isn’t just for students—it’s a rhythm many of us still feel. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how early school experiences shape our emotional cycles, friendships, and sense of self, even decades later.

How many of you still organize your year around the school calendar? If you were a good student, the end of August was a time of excitement, and a time to gear up for a new year. You looked forward to seeing your schoolmates and telling all the summer tales of adventure.

If you were a not-so-good student, your anxiety started to gear up about mid-August, and you looked for ways to escape. Suddenly your clothes did not fit, and your backpack was nowhere to be found. You prayed for snow, even knowing that the thermometer was in the 90’s.

If you have school-aged children, you need to function on the school calendar. However, many still organize their year around that activity and have a deep emotional response to this time of year. You may be aware of this cycle and take it to heart, or you may be completely unaware and wonder why this time of year is disquieting.

Whether we realize it or not, our early school experiences stay with us in some way.

Some of us have maintained friends from elementary school. You may not have regular contact, but when you do meet or call, the sense of connection reappears automatically, as though you were young again and no time has passed.

Early school experiences can make a deep impression. I remember my second-grade teacher because she put a large wire cage in the center of the room and placed a hen in the cage. We watched in awe as that hen laid eggs and sat on them until these little chicks hatched. We had a lottery to see who would get to take the chicks home. Of course, our parents were not as excited as we were, but that teacher was brilliant. We learned about the circle of life and about caring for another creature. And yes, we were required to clean out the cage!

What school memories stand out for you? As a young child, your school experience can be powerful and set the stage for future experiences and feelings. Take a moment to go back in time and ponder the influences of early childhood on who you are now.

Want to explore the emotional impact of school memories? Visit Psychologs Magazine’s article on emotional attachment to school memories, Education Elements’ top 20 back-to-school memories, and Psychology Today’s guide to back-to-school stress.

If this season stirs reflection or emotional shifts, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and personal growth.

HOT, HOT, HOT

Scorched Gardens, Inventive Cooling, and the Art of Daydreaming

When the lilies wilt and the porch becomes a furnace, it’s time to honor the inventors who gave us relief. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores the intensity of summer heat, the history of cooling innovations, and the quiet joy of escaping into conversation and imagination.

I do not know your stance on Global Warming, but I sure know my stance on the weather for this summer of 2024: hot, hot, hot. The east coast has been hot and dry with some weird rains that are barely keeping the plants alive. I have already told you about the rain drops falling three feet apart. A few days ago, a deluge lasted about 15 minutes and came down so fiercely that you could not see straight ahead. I have a garden with a lovely section of lilies. Annually they open with large white blooms and a gorgeous scent. They last for days, and I can barely stand to leave the porch as their scent is mesmerizing. They are planted by the side of the screened-in porch so when you sit on the porch, the scent fills the air. Well, this summer the heat was so intense that every bud was scorched and turned brown. Not a single bud was allowed to mature. This is a first and hopefully a last!

Now given the weather reports from other parts of the country, I know I should not complain. Multiple tornadoes within days of each other, torrential rains and floods, parched woods up in flames and I am complaining about the heat. But complain I must. This is the nature of being human. Yes, we can have empathy for other parts of the country and the world. Yes, we can join organizations and send donations to support work in other parts of the country. Believe me, my bank account is tapped multiple times each month to show my care for others. Still, I live in this previous swamp known as Washington, D.C. and it is hot and dry!

But I only live in one place. I only experience one set of circumstances in my day-to-day life. And this summer is miserable for one who loves to be outside. While fanning myself, my mind wanders to the past centuries where there was no real escape from the weather. No wonder the life span was shorter. Working in this heat is brutal. I can go into an air-conditioned home and separate myself from the reality of the heat. Before 1902 no such thing existed. Willis Haviland Carrier was the man responsible for inventing air conditioning that could cool large buildings.

In the mid 1700’s Benjamin Franklin experimented with cooling as well. He was focused on cooling objects and not environments. Along with his co-experimenter, John Hadley who was a chemist, they managed to cool an object to freezing temperatures or below. In the 1800’s Michael Faraday experimented with liquifying ammonia to chill the air. Successful but not too practical.

Thanks to all these inventors we can now keep cool no matter the outdoor temperatures. So, while the garden fries, I can explore many things inside. The shelves are full of books, my musical instrument is readily available, watercolors and paints are handy, my checkbook needs to be balanced and I still have some tax things to do and of course my computer is here which could lead me in many different directions. For some reason none of those are calling me today. A glass of iced tea and a conversation are beckoning. No hot topics, however. Just reminiscing and planning for the future. This heat wave is perfect for daydreaming and future casting.

Want to explore how people stayed cool before air conditioning? Visit History.com’s guide to pre-AC cooling strategies, National Trust’s historic cooling tactics, and Smithsonian Magazine’s roundup of cooling inventions.

If the heat is stirring reflection or restlessness, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional clarity and seasonal resilience.

PARENTS

Transitions, Reflections, and the Power to Rebuild

Parenting doesn’t end—it evolves. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores the emotional complexity of launching children while caring for aging parents, and how personal growth and connection remain possible at every stage of life.

Many of you have aging parents and are in that space in life where you are launching your children and losing your parents. Perhaps you have looked to your parents for wisdom or support and are now realizing that soon they will be gone. You will be the generation expected to provide wisdom and support. This is an interesting transition for many reasons.

If you are fortunate to have parents that you love and admire, you will be soaking in their wisdom, reminiscing, and enjoying their company. If your parents have been difficult, you will be managing and negotiating around responsibility and obligation while preserving your own sanity. That is not an easy role to play. If your parents have been distant, you will probably be in avoidance mode, hoping that someone else will pick up the end-of-life responsibilities. Regardless of your role, this is not an easy time.

In this space, you look to your resources, both internal and external. When you reflect on your history and look for your emotional strengths and social supports, what do you find? What are the principles of relationships that sustain you? How have you built connections with others? What is your support system? We seem to address these areas of our lives in crisis times. Yet, we have the opportunity to be proactive and thoughtful about these areas of our lives. Even if you have not been proactive previously, you can start now.

Perhaps you have been self-contained, kept to yourself, or related only to your pet or your favorite cocktail. Moving forward does not have to be a re-run of the same. Look at your resources. Decide to make changes and take risks. I celebrate the people who look at their lives to date and decide to make changes that will better meet their needs. Maybe you have been abused or taken advantage of and used that as a reason to withdraw and avoid relationships. Yet, if you examine the past you will see that you could have made different choices and better choices. You can make a change. Join your local bridge club and build new relationships. Take water aerobics at your local YMCA and build connections with fellow water lilies!

Life has opportunities at every turn. You are not bound by the structures that your parents set up. You can start a new path, a new direction at any point in time. The key is being thoughtful about the direction you want to take. You can make changes in your life at any point in time.

Want to explore how to navigate aging parents and emotional transitions? Visit Care Indeed’s guide to coping with aging parents, Montana State University’s tips for speaking to aging parents, and BetterHelp’s strategies for managing changing dynamics.

If you’re navigating this transition and seeking clarity, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional resilience and relational growth.

RAIN

Drizzles, Downpours, and the Dance of Hydration

Rain isn’t just weather—it’s a lifeline. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores the wonder of rainfall, the science behind hydration, and the childhood joy of getting soaked while nature does its thing.

This is truly a part of nature that we take for granted. The Summer of 2024 on the East Coast has been parched and we are all looking for rain clouds. One day we got the weirdest rain I have ever seen. The songs about running between the raindrops would have been perfect for this one. I work where I can see the rain falling on the deck outside and I was shocked to observe about 4 to 5 feet between each rain drop. Really! The rain also came down so slowly that you could have literally run between the rain drops and not gotten wet! I like warm weather, but I am excited for winter for the first time in my life!

Water is essential for life. A person can survive without water for approximately 3 days. Think of that. If I were a plant in the garden or had to depend on the rainfall for my survival, I would be dead, dead, dead. Do you know what parts of your body are more “water” intensive? Your brain tops the charts at 95% water. Wow! I would never have imagined that. All of those brain cells that house all of our experiences are drowning in water. Lungs and blood come next on the chart being made of 80 to 90% water. Now, let’s just stop there and think about this. No wonder we are encouraged to drink a lot of water each day. The rule of thumb is one ounce of water for every 2 pounds of body weight. So, at 130 pounds, I should be knocking back slightly more than 8 glasses of water every day to keep my body afloat. And the rules say nothing about wine!

As I write this, miraculously, we are getting a 5-minute monsoon. Raining hard and fast, making it difficult to see across the yard. Then disappearing as fast as it came. The guy mowing the lawn is running for shelter and abandoning his mower for the lower porch. He is smart enough not to take refuge under the big tree. About a year ago, the paper reported the deaths of 3 visitors to the White House being killed by lightning as they sought shelter from the rain under a large tree. When lightning strikes a tree the current spreads through the ground around the tree turning it into a dangerous electrical grid. Stay away from trees folks. Opt to get soaked while heading for the house.

I remember running around the backyard as a kid and getting soaked while my mother was yelling at me to “get my butt inside!” If I could have separated my butt from my body, I would have sent it inside pronto. Do you remember trying to catch raindrops on your tongue? Being a kid in the rain is tons of fun.

Today, I will just have to settle for a drizzle.

Want to explore the science and significance of rain? Visit Sciencing’s overview of rainwater’s importance, European Wilderness Society’s guide to rain’s role in ecosystems, and USGS’s water science school on rain and precipitation.

If you’re reflecting on nature, hydration, or the rhythms of life, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and seasonal wellness.

BUILDING A RESERVE WITH OTHERS

Patience, Frustration, and the Currency of Connection

Relationships aren’t built on perfection—they’re built on grace. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how patience becomes a reserve we invest in others, and how emotional resilience helps us navigate the inevitable frustrations of group dynamics and human connection.

How often do you get frustrated with someone else? How does that frustration show in your relationship with the other?

Working in a group can sometimes be particularly problematic and frustrating. When each person is vested in their idea and plan, the tension can increase, and the frustration can lead to conflict or hard feelings. You have probably been there more than once. I know that I have, and frankly, sometimes it makes me wonder if the group process is worth the aggravation. Organizations can be unwieldy and complicated. They can sometimes seem like mazes that you have to get through, and there are so many dead ends that you get tired of retracing your steps and trying a new path. Now, I know we were born connected to one another and that we seek out connection with others as our natural state of being.

People always advise patience. Yes, I get it, but what does that really look like? What does it really mean? How often do I experience a model of patience that I can adopt? One of my dear friends has found the solution to frustrating interactions. She has a commitment to others and to herself that I truly admire.

Here is her sage advice:

“None of us is perfect, so we have patience with others to build up a reserve with others, hoping that reserve will be used towards us when we need it.”

Oh, what a beautiful sentiment and such wisdom. I want to practice having patience with others and envision the reserve that I am building. Perhaps seeing it as nuggets of gold will help me to accept the frustrations that come with being misunderstood, left out, or confused. I do not have to lean into frustration or worry. I can imagine those deposits building up and envision my own little Fort Knox that I can draw on in the future. Thank you, friend,* for that sage advice.

Share my blog posts with your friends and neighbors. Go to www.drvanderhorst.com to sign up for my blog. At the bottom of the first page. Add your email and click on subscribe.

*Thank you, Robyne

Want to explore how patience builds emotional resilience and strengthens relationships? Visit Psychology Today’s guide to transforming anger through patience, PositivePsychology.com’s overview of emotional resilience, and Science of Mind’s strategies for building emotional reserves.

If you’re ready to build your own reserve of patience and emotional strength, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and relational growth.

HEAT

Brownouts, Breezes, and the Battle for Comfort

Heat isn’t just a temperature—it’s a test of patience, creativity, and community. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how we cope with scorching summers, from porch memories to modern AC debates, and how self-care evolves with each wave of warmth.

Here in the Washington, DC area, we are experiencing a heat wave. Even the electrical grid is complaining about rolling brownouts to keep the entire grid from exploding or imploding. What would a grid do? Now I know why the colonials died so young. The weather can be brutal, and sap energy from your body, so your electrical grid gives out early. Any time you start complaining about advancements like AI, remember that we do not have it so bad with all these advancements.

But the heat! How does one take loving care of the body in this heat? I remember Mother telling all of us to drink lots of fluids. As a kid, that meant lots of water. Many adults avoid water because they were forced to drink so much as kids. Remember Kool-Aid? I suppose it still exists. That was my mother’s “go-to” to push water. The little powder packets were easy to use, and the flavors were better than the plain water. Toss in a bunch of ice cubes that you could crunch until some adult told you that you would break a tooth, and you were good to hydrate!

Another cooling trick was to soak a hand towel in icy water and drape that around your neck. I always thought it looked gross, and I avoided it because the boys used it. I am not sure why I assign a sex preference to that one, but I do. I do not think I liked the inconvenience of the towel, and when it fell off in the dust or dirt, the boys would just put it back on! Yuck! What is it with boys, anyway?

Of course, wearing light, breezy clothing was a help. It would be even better if it could be made of mesh or something holey. I especially remember Seersucker. Men’s suits for summer were always Seersucker, and since all of the girls sewed, we made seersucker shorts and shirts. Something about the ripples in that cloth made the breezes come through.

Now we are all stuck inside with the Air Conditioning. Do not get me wrong. I am grateful for the AC, but yesterday, I put on the sweater hanging on a chair in the kitchen. Really! Even as I put it on, I thought this was stupid, but I felt better! What is one to do with these modern conveniences? Of course, you will tell me to adjust the thermostat, but if you live with other humans, you know where that is going. I will choose the sweater every time.

I also hope for a break in this heat wave. Be grateful for the invention of the Air Conditioner. Make a pitcher of iced tea anyway. Avoid the Kool-Aid. And suffer through the corrections that AI will make to this essay.

Want practical ways to stay cool and care for your body during a heat wave? Explore Gentle Place Wellness Center’s heat wave self-care tips, Real Simple’s guide to protecting your body and brain, and Almanac’s 10 tips for surviving extreme heat.

If the heat is stirring reflection or discomfort, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional resilience and seasonal self-care.

ICED TEA

Porch Swings, Party Lines, and the Sweetness of Connection

Iced tea isn’t just a drink—it’s a ritual. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how a simple pitcher of tea evokes memories of community, conversation, and the quiet joy of slowing down together.

I remember summers on the porch, and invariably, the pitcher of iced tea would come out. In the heat of the summer, nothing tasted better. The tea was Lipton, of course, and it had been steeped for exactly 3 minutes and then poured into the big pitcher filled with ice. There were no tea bags. Those came along later. So, you have to be careful to confine the tea leaves to this mesh ball with a hinge on it so you can put the loose tea inside. Then, you filled a pitcher with ice to the top. When you poured in the hot tea, it made a crackling sound that was quite satisfying. While some of the ice melted with the hot liquid, plenty remained to cool the beverage for a good long time.

The porch was the place to gather. Of course, your porch had a porch swing and some other casual chairs. I think every house on the block had a front porch with a swing. Of course, our house also had a big back porch with another swing, but that is a story for another day. As the day cooled down and the neighbors came out, people would wander down the sidewalk and up onto the porch for a chat and a taste of your iced tea.

The visiting would last from a few minutes to close to an hour before the neighbor moved on depending on the neighbor and the topic of conversation. These evenings were better than the party line. Do you have any memory of the party line, or do you even know what it is? When I was a child, the telephone was affordable because you shared a telephone line with a few neighbors. Each neighbor had their own ring on the party line, so you would not pick it up unless the number of rings was for your house. Now, I know what you are thinking, and yes, it did happen. If you wanted to listen in on your neighbor’s call you would very carefully pick up the receiver. If you picked it up quickly, it would make a noise, and the neighbor would be able to tell you to get off the line. If you were successful, the results could be quite juicy!

Of course, there were times when the neighbor would “hog” the line, and some pretty heated conversations were had. But most of the time the phone was a great convenience. Now, we carry a phone around in our pockets. It seems like everyone has one, and the age for getting one keeps getting younger and younger. They make these simple flip phones for toddlers where you can put a picture of mom, dad, grandma, or someone else, and all the child must do is press the picture to start a call. That is real early training on using a phone.

Modern phones are amazing. In fact, I think most young people never use them for calling. They use them to text their friends or surf the various platforms that exist where you can watch little snippets of someone doing something silly or stupid. Many times I have seen two teenagers sitting next to each other with each typing away on their phones. When I asked one dyad what they were doing, I discovered they were texting each other! Yikes.

I prefer the iced tea on the front porch, where the neighbors can sit and visit for as long as they want.

Want to explore the nostalgia of iced tea and community connection? Visit Kitchen Journal’s guide to the Nostalgia Iced Tea Maker, Trend Hunter’s feature on Ryl Tea’s nostalgic flavors, and MeatChefTools’ article on brewing memories with a nostalgia tea maker.

If you’re reflecting on connection, memory, or slowing down, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and relational growth.

GUILT

Conscience, Courage, and the Power of Repair

Guilt isn’t just a burden—it’s a signal. For individuals in Maryland and DC, this reflection explores how guilt helps us navigate social life, how it can be transformed into growth, and how sincere apology can lead to healing and reconnection.

Let’s face it: There are times when we feel guilty, and that is a good thing. Where does this feeling come from? Did you ever wonder why your brain has this ability to experience something that you are doing and immediately start wagging its finger at you and telling you that this is a very, very bad idea. Who programmed this brain to know? How does it know? Can I shut this part off?

Apparently, we come into this world with this innate ability to know when we have crossed the line and are doing something wrong. Great programming. Still, I wonder why we have this program automatically loaded in our brains. This is great preparation for being in a social environment. Without it, we might be committing mayhem with regularity. Think of this as a skill. How can we use this skill to help us? We know when we have offended others or shamed them, and we feel bad about doing that. Still, at times it can be just what we want to do even if we do feel bad.

This form of aggression is always available to us. As teens, we tend to use this with regularity. Boys make fun of each other in the locker room. Girls tease each other about romantic interests. We get our licks in. As adolescence wanes, and we come out of the hormonal fog, we look back with regret. I remember a friend who was a talented musician talking about the torture that he delivered to some peers in high school. He was one of the cool guys who played guitar well and attracted the girls. He enjoyed picking on the lesser guys who were nerdy or had no particular talent to set them apart. As an adult, he felt true grief about those teen interactions. I admired the next move that he made. He actually found the guys he tortured and apologized. That took courage.

That also relieved his guilt and led to healing for him and the guys he had shamed and tortured. I admire his courage and willingness to make amends. When we truly embrace ourselves and take responsibility for who we have been and what we have done, we grow into ourselves and become the people we were designed to be. Who do you owe an apology to? Make it soon.

Want to explore how guilt can lead to emotional growth? Visit Thoughts from a Therapist’s guide to resilience and apology, Psychology Today’s article on the power of apology, and The PBT Institute’s guide to transforming guilt into growth.

If you’re ready to turn guilt into healing, therapy can help. Learn more about individual therapy in Maryland and DC or explore therapeutic approaches that support emotional insight and personal transformation.